Birth

Thursday Dec. 22

I woke up and realized that I hadn't felt the baby since Wednesday morning so I called and left a message with Dr. Chalmer's medical assistant. I got ready and headed to my parents house to see Peter and Michelle before I went to work. About noon I got a call from Dr. Ott's medical assistant who said that Dr. Chalmer's was out of the office so head into Labor and Delivery to be monitored.
I told my Dad I had to leave work (I am so grateful I work for my Dad so I could leave and he would understand) and I grabbed Scott from his office. We ran and dropped Stella off with my sister Anna and headed over to Labor and Delivery.

The CNA hooked me up to the monitor and started listening for the heart beat. She was having a hard time telling the difference between my heart beat and the baby's heart beat so a nurse came in to start looking. They finally found it and it was pretty low around 115 beats per minute and was just a steady line. The heart is supposed to go up and down on the monitor but it wasn't. Almost immediately another nurse came rushing in to see what was going on. (All the nurses were at the nurses station watching the heart beat on their computer) The difference between my heart beat and the baby's was really small. Then the baby's heart beat dropped to about 90 beats per minute and that set off the hospital. The hospital was trying to get a hold of Dr. Chalmers and figure out what needed to be done with the fact that the baby had severe Ebstein's. Dr. Ellis came in and said she had finally gotten a hold of Dr. Chalmers and she wanted to know what we wanted to do. They needed to take the baby or he was going to die for sure. At this point his heart dropped down to 60 bpm and a nurse came in and put an IV in my arm, Scott and I immediately said we wanted to try to save him with an emergency C-Section. The heart beat had dropped again to only about 20 bpm and then they couldn't find the heart beat.
I could hear out in the hall they had announced a code 1 which I had no idea what that meant but I was rushed down the hall where they immediately put me under and took the baby.
He wasn't breathing when they finally got him out so they hooked them up to everything and tried to revive him after about 20 minutes they asked Scott if he wanted them to continue and Scott decided to have them stop.
They brought him all wrapped up in a blanket and gave him to Scott to hold. My parents showed up a couple minutes later to help Scott.

From the time we got into the hospital to the time the baby was born was about 20 minutes. It was really fast, hard and confusing.

The hospital was absolutely amazing, we were able to hold him for hours, a professional photographer came in and took pictures of him, they created molds of his feet and hands, and got his foot and hand prints. They put everything into a cute little box. Everyone was so sweet and kind.

We named him

Atticus Gray Madsen
Dec. 22, 2011
1:26pm

weighed: 2 lbs 0 ounces

length: 12.5 inches

He was so beautiful (I wasn't sure how appropriate it is to put his picture on, I don't want to freak anyone out) He had Stella's nose and lips. He had a cutest little ears, fingers and toes. I couldn't believe how gorgeous he was and how much he looked like Scott and I at only 26 weeks.
Letting him go was one of the hardest things I have ever done. I could of held him for days.

I am so grateful for the gospel because I think that knowing I will be able to see him again is the only reason I can get out of bed every morning.
 I was released from the hospital at 6:00pm on Christmas Eve.

Baby Boy

Diagnosis

(no pictures)

Tuesday Dec. 20
Scott and I went to Salt Lake to have my Fetal Echo Cardiogram at Primary Children's it took about 45 minutes. After the Echo the cardiologist took us into a grief room which we then figured was bad. Then they brought in a social worker and a fetal heart coordinator. The cardiologist told us the baby's Ebstein's Anomaly was severe, he had fluid in his lungs, his stomach, around the umbilical cord and his heart was already enlarged.
It was a complete shock, at my last appointment there was no extra fluid. So the fact that this happened in 3 weeks was not good. It was really hard to take it all in.
She said that the baby wouldn't make it full term but that they would watch him every week to every other week, depending on how he was doing. She said they didn't want to take him early because the fluid in his lung might have made it so his lungs are not developed as far as they should be. She wanted the baby to "cook" as long as possible.
If he survived birth then he would have to have multiple heart surgeries. The first surgery would be no earlier then 2 days old then he would have another surgery at 6 months old. He would have to have around 4 more surgeries depending on how me was doing. It would be a really long road.
They got me an appointment for the 28th with Dr. Jackson in St. George then another appointment at Primary Children's on the 13th of January.

The drive home was VERY LONG I cried almost the whole time off and on. Scott and I talked a lot and tried to help each get through the hard times that would be ahead.

Wednesday Dec. 21
It was a long rough day but at the end of the night Scott and I decided we would get a bag ready for the baby just in case he needed to be taken early and in case he didn't make it, I also wanted to start getting a bag ready for me. We spent the night talking about how to get through the pain. By the end of the night we both were feeling a little bit better and ready to take on whatever was thrown our way. I also had a list of items I wanted to get for the baby, the littlest jammies I could find, little blanket, a cute hat and his green elephant Stella picked out for him.

Working

Stella loves doing ANYTHING with Papa

So yesterday when he asked her if she wanted to go to the store with him

she jumped right on it and enjoyed a ride down to Colorland Power Equipment.

After they got back they cleaned up the office yard.

Even though Stella has been almost impossible lately

I absolutely love and adore her!

When she is happy she brightens up my day and makes everything better!

Thanks Papa for EVERYTHING!

Pregnancy Post: 23 & 24 Weeks

(Baby 23 weeks weighs as much as a large mango just over a pound, length 11 inches, couldn't find a mango that big)

(Baby 24 weeks is the lenght of an ear of corn 12 inches, weight gain about 1/4th pound, corn isn't in season)

After having evergy for a couple of days I got sick and lost it all, then Stella got sick and I spent a couple of  nights up all night with her. So I haven't gotten all my energy back yet.

I am hoping stress doesn't affect the baby to much because I have been over loaded lately! Working on Cub Scouts then getting another calling as Nursery Coordinator, working, Christmas, Stella being sick, no sleep, and anxiously waiting for my appointment at Primary Children's. I am hoping once my appointment is over then a lot of the stress will go away!

So excited/nervous about my appointment in a week!

I also have an appointment with my OBGYN, Dr. Chalmers, on Friday.

He doesn't move very much during the day but when I lay down to go to sleep he will kick and move for about 15 minutes every night. It is actually really relaxing to just lay there and feel him.

I bought a pair of maternity jeans, my pair from when I had Stella were AWFUL! I don't think I would have to have them yet but my hips have gotten wider faster then with Stella.

Don't know how much weight I have again but I can guess it is not pretty, haha

The other day I told Stella that when the baby comes she will get to help my hold the baby and feed the baby. She looked at me and said, " no mom we go to work." I let me her know we wouldn't be going to work any more we would stay home, well she didn't like that idea and let me know that we will be going to work. If we have to stay home for a whole day by the end of the day she starts asking when were going to work. I can't decide if it is good thing that she loves work or if she hates being at home. Who knows I guess we will find out in 2 months.

Christmas Tree Hunting

{Nov. 26}

It is a Dalton tradition to go cut down our Christmas Tree.

So we went right after Thanksgiving so that Anna, Laura and Dan could join us.

This was the first year Scott was able to join, I was so excited because this is one of my favorite tradition

We wanted to go up Cedar Mountain but because of the mud slide the road was closed.

So we headed to the Arizona Strip

(yes if you drive far enough there are trees)

 I LOVE this picture of Stella and Anna

They are both so beautiful

 All the boys got to cut down a tree

and yes that is my tree!

Scott did an amazing job cutting it down.

 Dan did a great job too cutting the tree down for the neighbor

 Of course we had to take the Jeep out and try some hills

Dan, Scott and my Dad really enjoyed it

I stayed in the truck with Stella because it was pretty cold.

But we screamed for them, haha

I think this year is the biggest tree I have gotten so far

It is not to tall but it is really fat!

We have it all decorated and Stella loves to have the lights on.

Oh and this is my 200th post!

Shirts

To everyone who reads my blog, I'm not sure how many

but I have a friend who started a t-shirt company in St. George, Twill Co. 

(click on to go to their ETSY page)

They have really good quality T-shirts for men and women. 

I have two and love them, super soft and are already preshrunk.

If you have facebook go and like them

they are trying to get there shirts and information out.

Thanks to everyone for helping me get the information out

I really appreciate it.

Pregnancy Post: 22 Weeks

(Baby boy is the size of a spaghetti squash weighs almost 1 lb, length 11 inches)

Well I definitely didn't mean to have my shirt match the squash and the wall!

I finally have energy and it has been amazing! I have gotten so much done I love it. Tons of clean and organizing.

I am still wearing regular clothes, I did buy a belly band to help with my hernia scar and wear it every once in awhile.

Primary Children's Cardiology Department didn't call back so I called on Monday and left a message. Then I called again Tuesday morning and was able to actually talk to someone. I have my first appointment with the Cardiologist on December 20th at 11:00am. I didn't think it would take that long to get an appointment but the nurse said they are booked. I am the Committee Chairman in Cub Scouts so I am using that right now to keep my busy and not think about it.

I have another appointment with my OB/GYN Dr. Chalmer's on the 16th so this next month is full of appointments.

I am starting to get the extra room/storage room cleaned out so I can move Stella into it after Christmas, I am really excited to get it all complete.

I have probably gained about 10 pounds so far which I think is pretty good.